Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Day 5: My definition of love

My definition of love, is this guy. Even before we were together, we always took care of each other. He made it through a whole winter dealing with me and my S.A.D, (we were good as long as I was in bed by 9:30). He keeps me focused and helps me remember the bigger picture. He's my best friend and even does the dishes for me when I ask him to. He never lets me forget how much he loves me, and I do the same.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Day 4: What I ate, and thoughts on a weird movie

What did I eat today? I'll tell you what I ate today.

Strawberries from Costco. These babies are a sure sign that summer is coming. Bite into a big, juicy strawberry and all your cares will go away. Mmmmm.... I think I'm going to eat some more now.

Side note: What are your thoughts on the movie Eat, Pray, Love? I watched it the other night and I've been trying to decide what I think about it over the last few days. 

At first, I thought I loved it. There are so many lessons to be learned from it, about forgiveness, life, and finding joy in the journey. Here are a couple of my favorite quotes from IMDB.

"Maybe my life hasn't been so chaotic. It's just the world that is and the only real trap is getting attached to any of it. Ruin is a gift. Ruin is the road to transformation."

This one especially, which I think was the underlying message of the whole movie:
"In the end, I've come to believe in something I call "The Physics of the Quest." A force in nature governed by laws as real as the laws of gravity. The rule of Quest Physics goes something like this: If you're brave enough to leave behind everything familiar and comforting, which can be anything from your house to bitter, old resentments, and set out on a truth-seeking journey, either externally or internally, and if you are truly willing to regard everything that happens to you on that journey as a clue and if you accept everyone you meet along the way as a teacher and if you are prepared, most of all, to face and forgive some very difficult realities about yourself, then the truth will not be withheld from you."

The thing that really bothers me about the whole movie is how she ended up on this journey of self-discovery in the first place. One of the first scenes in the movie is Julia Roberts' character wandering around her house, thinking about the life she has built for herself, her house, her career, her husband, and wondering how she is so unhappy with something she takes full responsibility for creating. After a few moments in the movie of a whispered prayer, begging The Lord to tell her what to do, Liz Gilbert gets back in bed with her husband and says, 

"I don't want to be married anymore."

Wait, what? You've built a life with a person for x amount of years and when you find yourself in a place of uncertainty and self doubt, your first thought is to scrap everything and start over without a second thought to maybe expressing your concerns to your husband and trying to work things out? And we as the audience are just supposed to be okay with that? Keep in mind that this unhappiness really had nothing to do with her husband. He was a man who couldn't make up his mind about a career, yes, but he was really depicted as a good guy. Obviously, I've never been divorced and I'm in a pretty dang good spot in my marriage, so my view is probably slightly skewed, but there is something terribly unsettling to me about that. I've gained a very different perspective about marriage in the past nine months and I've come to regard it as something very special, sacred even. The fact that a decision of this magnitude was regarded so lightly to her (at least it was depicted that way in my opinion) was really sad to me.
I learned in my human development class that a healthy person continuously goes through what is called the MAMA cycle. It's an acronym that refers to periods of Moratorium and Achievement. A moratorium period is a period of self-reflection, or a period where you don't necessarily have it all planned out. Achievement is when things start to come together and you set out on a given path. When you come to a fork in the road, you enter another moratorium period, so on and so forth throughout your life.
So while Liz is in this moratorium period, don't you think the person who has vowed to be her companion for the rest of her life might have a little more insight? He probably can sense that she's unhappy. Why let him help her get to the root of the problem instead of kicking his butt to the curb, breaking his heart and then having that guilt to get rid of later on?
I'm not saying that divorce is never warranted, but it's a sad commentary on society when a situation like this is considered normal or even praised. I'm the minority when I say I'm willing to weather the storms as they come with my husband and that is a tragic fact.
You don't need a year, two boyfriends, three countries, a new language and a pair of fat jeans to find yourself.

Monday, March 28, 2011

Day 3: Parents

I have the greatest parents in the whole world. 

 My mom and me on my wedding day.

My mom, the new Chinese Flagship Coordinator at BYU! I love my mom. She has done so much to keep our family solid despite so many ups and downs. She has taught me so much about having faith when things are uncertain and how to have a great marriage. I know I can go to her for anything and she'll tell me to quit freaking out, or give me advice. I hope to be half the mom she is one day. :)

My dad is a Jack-of-All-Trades. He is a Appraiser, Drummer in a band, and a Respiratory Therapist. He is the inspiration behind my love of music, and the medical field. I always know I'll never drive a lemon because I'll have him to help me pick out a good car. I'll never over pay for a house because I'll have him to tell me the exact value, just by looking at it. He is such a great guy and I'm so glad to be a daddy's girl!

And the best part is, they're just in love as ever. :)

Love you Mom and Dad!

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Day 2

First love. This is so embarrassing to write about considering how nasty he is now but when Mission: Impossible 2 came out, I was seriously obsessed with this guy:

Tom Cruise. Oh yes. Keep in mind this was the year 2000, before the whole "jumping on Oprah's couch" incident and scientology. I wasn't the only one that thought he was hot, right? Come to think of  it, he was still married to Nicole Kidman. I'm not sure how that little kink played out in my mind... Anyway. I just thought about that yesterday and laughed out loud, so I thought I'd let you all in on that little secret of mine. I guess I should count my lucky stars that that never went anywhere...


Saturday, March 26, 2011

Day 1

This is me.

This is Ian, my husband.

I chose our wedding pictures because we were skinnier then.
I'm working on getting a nursing degree and have been on and off for the past few years.
I don't eat vegetables very often.
I'm a caretaker and always have been.
I have the best job in the world, even if it does involve making kids cry...
I hate country music.
I love medical dramas, even if all I do when I watch them is point out the flaws.
The Office is my favorite show (and I think I might cry when Steve Carell leaves this season).
I'm spending the summer in Texas, which both excites and terrifies me.
I've been married for 9 months to the best husband ever.
I love my life!!

30 days

My sister Jillian has been doing this on her blog, and I thought it might be kind of fun to do too. Sorry I stole your idea, Jill, but you stole it too so it's ok. Hopefully I'll be able to stick with it!

day 01 – introduce yourself with pictures and words
day 02 – your first love

day 03 – your parents

day 04 – what you ate today 

day 05 – your definition of love

day 06 – your day
day 07 – your best friend

day 08 – a moment

day 09 – your beliefs
day 10 – what you wore today 

day 11 – your siblings

day 12 – what’s in your bag

day 13 – this week
day 14 – what you wore today
day 15 – your dreams
day 16 – your first kiss
day 17 – your favorite memory

day 18 – your favorite birthday
day 19 – something you regret

day 20 – this month

day 21 – another moment

day 22 – something that upsets you
day 23 – something that makes you feel better

day 24 – something that makes you cry
day 25 – a first
day 26 – your fears
day 27 – your favorite place

day 28 – something that you miss

day 29 – your aspirations

day 30 – one last moment

Monday, March 21, 2011


The american academy of pediatrics announced today that their new guideline for car seats is that children should be in rear-facing car seats until age 2, and in a booster seat until age 8, or until they're 4' 9" tall. Not even lying... Go here if you don't believe me. Don't get me wrong, I understand that the AAP's only intentions are to keep kids safe and healthy, and I advise most of their guidelines to the patients I work with every day, but seriously, doesn't this look a little bit ridiculous?

(Thanks to aimee4frogs' on flickr for this pic that so perfectly illustrates my point)
Also, a booster seat until your kid is 8, or 4' 9'' (whichever comes first)? I have married friends who would still be in a booster seat by that guideline. And don't you think it would be slightly embarrassing for you to pull up to a friend's birthday party in your mom's minivan and then have to unbuckle your car seat in front of all your friends? I mean, really... c'mon.
For all you worried moms out there, in the words of one of the pediatricians I work for, "On the record, we follow the standards of the AAP, off the record, as long as the car seat fits them and doesn't constrict their neck in any way, it is okay to face forward." I'd double check with your own doctor before doing anything, but I just thought I'd comment on this strange new guideline. I have to wonder if anyone in the American Academy of Pediatrics actually has children...

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Brain defrag

Researchers (or, I'm not really sure which) say the only reason we sleep is so our subconscious can defrag and be refreshed to take on our next challenge. That's why we dream. Our brain is just spewing out the random events/things we've been thinking about. Well, I'm considering this my "conscious brain defrag."
I have a lot in my head right now. That's not a new thing, but I've been thinking a lot about life in general so I decided now is a good time to just write it all out. I'm sure it's going to be a rambled mess of run-on sentences, but feel free to keep reading if you wish.
So first of all, a bit of exciting news. After going back and forth for months and coming to a clear conclusion that I am a terrible decision maker, I finally decided that I'm going to brave the cockroaches and the mold this summer in Corpus Christi, TX. Ian's going to be selling alarm systems for Vivint (formerly A-P-X alarm, individual letters pronounced. Before that: APX alarm, like apex. Seriously? Make up your mind on your company's name. You're confusing everyone.) and I'll be doing... pretty much everything else. They have a children's hospital there and, after really coming to love pediatrics over the past year, I'm thinking I'll be spending a lot of time there volunteering. There's also like 8 other hospitals there so I'm sure I'll have some good experience to add to my resume. Also, did I mention there's a beach there. Yeah. PS this is the image that came up when I googled it.

Doesn't that look amazing? I think so.
The biggest obstacle in this decision-making process has been deciding whether or not to leave my job. I really have the best job in the world. I work with amazing women, and doctors who care about their patients and employees, and from whom I've learned so much, there is ZERO drama, and we all work so well together and learn so much from each other. I really hate the thought of leaving, because I'm 100% positive that there is no better workplace in the entire world.
Also a little sidenote: this job has really taught me a lot more about what it is to be a mom. How it really is a 24/7 job that you get little, if any, breaks from. It's RSV season, and I've seen mom's going on 2 days of no sleep with their little tiny babies who are completely inconsolable, and somehow they just keep going, all for the sake of that baby. Or another example is a mom that I've spent a lot of time talking to. She found out she was pregnant with her 2nd baby when her oldest was 6 weeks old. Add to that, her husband travels for weeks at a time on business. Her 2nd baby is now 6 months old, and at his checkup appointment the other day, I told her how much I admired her and asked her how she does it. She said, "Well, I either do it, or my kids die. So I guess I just have to be tired." I don't know why that struck such a chord with me, but I was really impressed with her answer. Motherhood is really the most selfless thing on the earth. I'm sure of it.
Anyway, back to what we were talking about. I feel like we're moving in the right direction. I think back to times in my life where I thought I was in the best place I could possibly be, but then when I took that next step into the unknown, a whole world opened up that I didn't even know existed. And when I look back to that place I thought I would be devastated to leave, of course there are certain aspects of it that I will always miss, but it doesn't feel as bad as I thought it would. That's what I'm hoping to gain from this experience. I've always been a person who needs a set-in-stone plan, but I don't have that here. To tell you the truth, I kind of like it. It a little bit makes me want to freak out, but I know I'll be okay and so I'll just move forward.
What all this will hopefully lead me toward is more guidance about what the heck I'm supposed to be doing for school. I feel like this is life right now:

I did that in Paint. Do you like it?
Anyway, I just have no idea how to climb this stinkin' mountain. It's not enough just to become an RN anymore. You have to pick the right program, have the right grades, have previous experience in the medical field, all these wild cards that somehow say to a prospective employer, "Hire me!" I know it sounds like I'm complaining, and, I won't lie, I'm getting a little frustrated with the whole process in general, but it's really more of an observation. Because, really, who's not in this position? (If you're not, you will be very soon. I assure you.) So I guess I just get to be like everyone else and figure this whole thing out one step at a time, which really gets in the way of my set-in-stone planning mentality. Maybe that's what this is supposed to teach me. Set-in-stone plans are for people who never plan on getting anywhere in life. Because it changes in the blink of an eye, and if you can't adapt, life will pass you by.
For some reason, I'm drawn to the U right now. Ian and I were up there last night with some friends, and we're both really liking that idea after talking about it. They have a great nursing program and they have the hospital there that sees all kinds of interesting cases. I would learn a lot. So I'm gonna let that thought simmer for awhile, and see where it takes me. Who knows, maybe I'll look like these guys come fall:

Go Utes! haha

xoxo, Cori